Caption contest!

The following picture, in an advertisement in Asahi, made me laugh louder than is perhaps appropriate on a train:

I immediately began to think of hilarious ways to caption this photo, but instead I thought I might turn it over to you, my readers. Over the next week, email your captions to observingjapan@gmail.com. I will post the best of the bunch next week, and maybe even provide a prize for the winner.

UPDATE: I should offer my own submission: "Watching cartoons gave young Shinzo the mistaken impression that holding a light bulb over your head could give you a clue."

And: "Coming soon! The Abe Shinzo lamp. Sheds light on everything but the wrongdoing of members of his cabinet."

UPDATE 2: From Shingen of I, Shingen: "Abe Shinzo discovers that the North Koreans have abducted his light fixtures. Someone should call Paul Stookey."